Sea? Titil itself of this peece making my point. It all about English spelling. In psychology, for instance, p being silent. Then why not in spelling also put one silent p, I asking. Everybody silent about this, because they not know. (By the bye, it just now only striking me why in crossword cloo it say quiet when it mean p.) Many peoples before itself commenting about English spelling, so I also feeling compelled to do same. It very weird, I thinking. Take well known rhyme now: I before e, except after c. This not applicapable to weird, which proving that it very weird. It having rhyme, yes, but what about reason, prithee tell me (prithee word I learning from drama play of my nameshake). Then there this alphabeta called c. Sometime it sound like s and sometime it sound like k. It, it, what that word, yes, it come to me now, skitchofrenic. Sometime it changing mind about what it being in very same word! (I giving egg sample: concatenation.) Matters getting vorse when two cs gathering in one place. They completely going berserk and behaving like x. (I again giving egg sample: success.) It strange phenomenon. And why not fenomenon? Why p and h ganging up and muscling in on what rightfully f’s place? If you putting ph in f’s place, why not phat, phan, phollicle, phantastic? Then let us say f taking revenge on ph and put fantom, fantasmagoria, filosophy. This h also sometimes teaming up with c and grabbing k’s place. Also it appearing with g in might, tight and right, and it beating me what it doing there. It mischieph maker, I thinking. Coming to thinking of it, what g doing there in first place? Confusion confounded when two letters having almost same sound. Like w (by the bye, why it being called double u? You not even needing glasses to see it actually looking like double v) and v. So vim and win having same sound, but not spelling. We moving on now to the mysteries of the bowels. Or it being vovels? As case may be. These being five in number but problems they causing not being countable. First of all, why I doing duty as a in first? And one typing anywhere, but not averywhere. It everywhere. You using I in wind, and also this same I again in find. I sounding like I in wipe, but in type, I sound job being done by y. Why? And u. Sometime it making short a sound, sometimes it making you sound, and sometimes it simply standing around like silent bystander. And what they mean by putting double u (not w double u, u double u) in vacuum? It making one fume. Now we coming to this word manuver. If you spelling it correctly, I giving you peanut burfy. One movement, I check dictionary; here it go: m and a and n and o and e and u and v and r and e. It as if someone wake up one day and saying, hey, say what, what ho, I say, by Jove, rum thing, eh, (all these being Britishisms, I bunging in for othenticity) why not have word with all the bowels? But even they not being able to bring themselves to put I in it. I thanking them for showing so much restraint. But what point in going on and on? There being no dirth of egg samples. Every second word in English language illustrious of wonky spelling. As if there not enough confucius, Americans declaring independance (or is that being e) and changing spellings randomly, because they have dislaxia and also disrespect for British. It all very obituary! Or is it being orbitrary? Anyway, in middle of all this, Indians winning spelling bee contest regularly. That because they getting it all by heart. Head no use when it come to spellings.
Month: July 2015
I writing to kindly bring to your attention plight of vertical peoples in this our lowly city. Or it being lovly? As case may be. Majority of gents and all ladies in our city being below six feet, they not facing this problem. I renumbering one old advertisementing for Complan in which one boy hanging from handrail in bus. If that boy knowing the difficulties lurking round corner when he grow up, he not hanging from handrail. This same handrail treacherously give him rap on head when he become tall. Why? Because bus is built for average person. Whole city built for average peoples only. Average in heights, I’m meaning, they may be intellectual giants and horizontally well developed, I not costing aspersions. It very mean. Generally, height is not handicap, lack thereof it is. But if always you be in imminent danger of being fetched nasty rap on head by just a few egg samples: 1. Signboards, 2. Electric transformers, 3. Door frames, 4. Bus roofs, 5. Underside of stairways, 6. Flying saucers, then it deplorable, unfair, discriminalatory to tall peoples. One day, tall man looking at ground and walking, because he humble or not wanting to step in dog poo, then a hoarding planted in middle of pavement come into violent contact with his head, then he holding head and cursing the ugly offspring of the ugly offspring of nameless vileness that put the hoarding there, may he go away and come back as a louse. Then for next many months, tall man is careful. He fearfully looking upwards constantfully as he walks, never mind dog poo. Then one day come, tall man forget, his head in clouds, and he relax vigil for moment, doorway catches him on top of head. His head in executive agony. Or is it being exequisuit? As case may be. Then tall man revile all illegitimate pygmy sons of dwarf lilliputs who building booby traps all over place. What tall peoples to do? Wear helmet all time? Not at all practical. So it my humble request to all peoples to raise bar for safety for tall peoples.
Other day I watching old Tamil film song video on U tube. It having Raja music, so I intentioning to watch with eyes closed. But then I seeing that it featuring Bhanu Priya. So I watching with both eyes and ears. Before I forgetting to mention I mentioning that song is meaning ‘electricity in small laugh’ in English. Bhanu Priya truly being electric. She dancing like she having springs in backbones and rubber in knee joints. It also helping she very restful to eye. The song being so entertaining, I watching it again. You know how it is, in second viewing you catching details you miss first time. This time around, I realizing with mild shock that there is second person in video, not only Bhanu Priya. This person is very fat, very dark and making hideous look like sadly inadequate adjective. I watching video third time to solve mystery of why Tamil movie suddenly turning into remake of beauty and beast. Now I noticing that this person also moving his limbs, which looking like hippo pottamas legs. That only his arms. His legs looking even fatter. Then it dawned on me, this man trying to match moves with Bhanu Priya. When Bhanu Priya shaking leg, he shaking leg fat. When Bhanu Priya piroetetting, he turning around slowly like circus elephant doing atma pradakshinam. When Bhanu Priya jumping into air, spinning like top, doing scissor kick and then landing gracefully, he simply jiggling his breasts. There being only one word to describe this man’s performance: gross, grotesque and horrific. That three words, I know, I can count very well, thank you, but after I saying one word, I finding that it not enough. Then I watch video fourth time. I finding now that this person growing on one. He showing such endearing oblivilousness of his grossfulness; it like he taking well known advice to dance like nobody watching. This actually too true. Who will watch him when Bhanu Priya also in same frame?